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Gold Diggers

11/20/2013

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I’m embarrassed that I hadn’t written an official Gold Diggers review until now…it is, after all, my favorite dive bar in Los Angeles. Maybe it’s a similar situation as telling your partner you love them for the first time and you’re afraid the words will come out all jumbled and retarded. Here it goes:

Gold Diggers is a trashy bikini bar located in the barrio of Santa Monica Boulevard, between Wilton and St. Andrews. It sits nestled between discount markets and donut shops and run-down apartment complexes. Upon entering, you'll be greeted by Herman, the large (and wonderful) bouncer. Don't be fooled by his rough exterior, after a couple shakedowns, you'll see he's a gentle giant. Like a Pitbull, he trusts family.


The collection of dancers is diverse: big ones, small ones, short ones, tall ones...all of varying ages and races. The curvy Latina who dances weekday afternoons is my favorite, so I suggest you throw dollars at her.

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Drinks are not necessarily the selling feature of Gold Diggers; they're small and a bit pricey, but you are paying for the live entertainment and overall experience. Being regulars, Chad and I rarely have to order our drinks...a screwdriver, a shot of Jack, and a Budweiser just magically appear in front of us.

If you come at just the right time, you might be blessed with the presence of the Mamasan. She owns the place and she and her daughters frequently play bartender. Although friendly and outgoing, I wouldn't want to get on the Mamasan's bad side. She seems like the type to smack you with a yardstick if you don't play by her rules.

Gold Diggers celebrates their anniversary with an annual party, complete with free chicken wings, egg rolls, and chow mein.  Although the party is a must-visit for Gold Diggers fans, it does get pretty crowded.  I prefer the venue around 6:30pm on a Friday; it's a bit more mellow.

On our second date, Chad and I ventured over to Gold Diggers after a failed visit to Jumbo's (see post from 3.29.11). The difference in quality is like night and day. Yes, Jumbo's has the notoriety, but trust me on this one, go to Gold Diggers if you need a night of unbridled Asian sleaze. If you were to ask me which bar is dearest to my heart, I would say, without a doubt, Gold Diggers.





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Damon's Steakhouse

11/15/2013

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Okay, this is going to be a bold statement: Damon's Steakhouse reminds me of a Valley version of Old Tony's.  There, I said it.

Yes, it's missing the beautiful 360 degree ocean view, but it has that old-school charm that makes certain restaurants/bars far superior to others.  As soon as you step in through the back door, this Polynesian-themed restaurant transports you back to the Golden Girls-era.  Seriously, it reminds me so much of that episode of the Golden Girls where Blanche tries to seduce this standoffish guy, so she rents this tiki-themed hotel room that has all these remote-controlled sex contraptions.  It's like that, minus the sex contraptions. This place totally feels like Reno, Nevada.

Like Tony's 'Firechief', Damon's also has a famous cocktail: the 'Chi Chi' (however, I don't believe you get to keep the glass).  There is also a singer/guitarist next to the bar who plays pleasant listening music.  What song do we hear upon entering??  'I've Got a Name' by fucking JIM CROCE?!?!  Yeeeah buddy, you're getting a tip for that one.

I very much enjoyed Damon's.  Can't wait to come back and try a juicy, bloody steak! 


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Melody Lounge

11/14/2013

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After splitting a large pitcher of margaritas at La Golondrina on Olvera Street, a day-drunk Chad and I stumble over to Chinatown to visit a favorite watering hole: Hop Louie.  Unfortunately, Hop Louie is closed, so we wander around until we find something equally dirty and inviting.  From the outside, the Melody Lounge appears to fit the bill: run-down sign, sandwiched between two "nice" gift shops, and desperately in need of a paint job....BINGO!  We walk in and are put off by the unexpectedly hip atmosphere.  Dozens of small paper lanterns hang from the ceiling, cascading dim light over the young couples cozied up on the PVC cushions surrounding the left side of the bar.
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We take a seat at the bar and realize it's a beer-only bar, no problem.  We order two beers, then attempt to pay with a card.  Cash only.  Boooo.

Positive points of interest: the bartender was quiet and the patrons kept to themselves.  I think I heard Chad mutter "I hate people" only once during our entire twenty minute visit (I believe in reference to the colorfully-dressed Asian couple canoodling and giggling inappropriately loud in the corner).  Also, they have a record player and, at the time, the bartender was playing some bluesy female-fronted music.

I left my pink wooden bird magnet at the bar.  I think the species of bird is Toucan. If you find it, please contact me ASAP.

Xxx,
Alyssa

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